Hi, Iris. Is it okay if you call my friend right now? He has a history of depression. I’m busy right now and he really needs someone to talk to.
Life has a funny way of waking you up by punching you in the face with a surprise. Here was my friend, whom I haven’t seen in over 2 years, seriously asking if I could pick up the phone and listen to the story of a person I have never met in my life.
So I hesitated. (Naturally.)
There is something about vulnerability and loneliness that gets us running in the opposite direction. But then I started thinking: I talk about love all the time. With my friends. To my students. In my journal. I’m an ardent believer but not a good practitioner. If I had to be honest, real honest, the things about love that I love the most are the very things I suck at. Because at the heart of love is a willingness to be inconvenienced. Love doesn’t count the cost. And when a broken person reaches out in the dark, love does not look the other way.
A world where strangers meet you at the point of your deepest brokenness — that sounds awfully nice. So I stopped running.
I wasn’t able to call him that night but I did text him. I do not know what demons he is facing or why he was so desperate for someone — anyone — to sit down and tell him that everything was going to be okay but I did anyway. The honest truth is that I don’t really know if things will actually get better. Maybe he’s at rockbottom and his life is utter crap. Maybe he’s dealing with wounds that will take a lifetime to heal. But I believe we are able to recover from everything. I believe we were wired that way. Call me an idealist but I believe that if a broken man searches for hope and is patient with life, he will find it. I believe that we are covered in a beautiful mystery called grace, which picks us up from the wreckage and restores us in ways we could not even begin to hope for. But we have to let it.
It still surprises me how many people out there are waiting for even the smallest glimmer of hope to come piercing through. Well, guess what? We’re all windows with the potential to shine some light.
I told the guy that day that I would gladly help him in any way I possibly could. And then I told him something and it’s a statement that changed my life and continues to change it because it is true even when I believe it isn’t. This statement dictates how I feel about myself as well as the decisions I make, most especially what I choose to do once my world has collapsed entirely.
YOU ARE LOVED.
Knowing I am loved changes everything. It gives me the freedom to take risks and pursue dreams. It is the truth that strips down my walls, giving me the chance to just breathe and be me. Knowing I am loved means I am fully aware that someone will still want me even after I have crashed and burned and failed again; even after my outer shell has been wrecked to reveal an entire wardrobe of ugliness.
Knowing I am loved means that I have nothing to lose. Knowing I am loved changes the game for good.
It’s a pretty simple statement. Maybe you’ve heard it before. Maybe you’ve been hearing it all your life. How many of you really know it? How many of you really believe in the truth and power of that statement? How many of you are willing to bet on its veracity? How many of you would claim that statement for your lives? How many of you would let it change you?
Everyone says that life is too short but the truth is that life is too freaking long to be spent thinking that nobody cares.
Just in case I haven’t gotten my point across enough, let me say it again. Louder.
You are loved.
You are. You really really are. Really and truly. I promise.
* If you have been wrestling with thoughts of suicide, call your local suicide prevention hotline. (All numbers can be found online) If you are from the Philippines, the numbers are: (02) 8969191 or 0917 854 9191. There are people who want to help you. You may also consider reading this.
Hang on. <3
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